Handling difficult emotions at work
Experiencing difficult emotions at work can pose various challenges – for the individual affected, and also for their colleagues and the business as a whole.
When these situations are not handled swiftly and well, either by the individual themselves or management, the impact can be far reaching. On occasions, where the difficulties don’t resolve themselves, matters may come to a head and then require expensive, formal HR/legal processes to address them.
How much better if these problems were addressed when the early indicators were showing.
What might we notice?
We might expect to see decreased performance and productivity from the individual concerned and also from colleagues who are impacted. The impact of stress, anxiety and sadness can impair the ability to focus, perform tasks and communicate well. In more extreme situations this can involve quite volatile or unpredictable behaviours which can place added strain on colleagues. We have observed such situations where team members tiptoe around the affected person because they don’t know how to handle the situation effectively.
Managers may feel unprepared or ill-equipped to handle such situations and this may lead them to avoid dealing with it completely or respond poorly or ineffectually. Greater absenteeism often results and again this might spread beyond the person immediately affected, to those who are struggling to deal with the results of that person’s behaviour and demands.
Commonly we might also expect to see interpersonal relationships under strain. Difficult emotions can sometimes express themselves in interpersonal conflicts, as individuals may become irritable, defensive, or withdrawn. This can impact collaboration and morale.
Emotional distress can cloud judgement and impair decision-making abilities. Employees may struggle to make sound decisions or react impulsively when experiencing heightened emotions, leading to potential mistakes or poor choices. Employees who are grappling with difficult emotions may feel disengaged or demotivated in their work. They may lack enthusiasm, initiative, or a sense of purpose, which can affect their overall job satisfaction and commitment to the organisation.
In our experience, notwithstanding good support systems and attentive managers, some individuals don’t voice their problems or request support at work, even where it would be available. Chronic stress or unresolved emotional issues can contribute to burnout, characterised by emotional exhaustion, cynicism, and reduced effectiveness at work. Burnout not only impacts individual wellbeing but also increases turnover rates and undermines organisational performance.
You can no doubt extend this list to include other impacts too – e.g. to customer service, concerns about safety and reputational risk, and HR/legal problems. Unfortunately, in our experience, many of these problems continue until they have to be dealt with formally. Unresolved emotional conflicts or misconduct in the workplace can escalate into legal and HR issues, including harassment complaints, grievances or legal action. Whilst these responses are sometimes inevitable, in our experience too many get to these stages unnecessarily. Failure to address emotional challenges proactively can expose the organisation to legal liabilities and reputational damage.
Addressing these work-related problems requires a multifaceted approach that prioritises employee wellbeing, fosters open communication, promotes emotional intelligence, and provides development and support mechanisms, such as employee assistance programs, coaching, and training in stress management and conflict resolution. This applies both to staff and management – employees well equipped to cope with their difficult emotions, and managers skilled and confident in handling such situations, will pre-empt many of these escalated crises.
In a related follow-up article we’ll discuss some of the cognitive behavioural coaching approaches we use to support and develop staff and managers in handling emotions effectively. To discuss how these can help you or your colleagues get in touch.